Sarah’s Blog

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Everyday I’m more AWAKE

So terribly (the reason for my passion and aspirations to give Dawah as much as possible while I’m still here)

In my past i’ve sinned so terribly
now I’m left with nothing but memories
regardless of repentance they randomly come to haunt me
making me feel so low and extremely unworthy
So what better thing to do then to help people to believe
help them to understand that society is simply designed to deceive
the truth is out there and its made for ANYONE to receive
I don’t want others to wrong themselves like I once did so terribly

When I woke Up (describes the crazy but straight path my life is on right now InshAllah)

Why is it that everything begins to take place all at once
its so overwhelming but it all needs to be done
none of it can be given priority over the other
but when it comes down to it, its Allah over my mother.
Regardless I must always remember the ends don’t justify the means
the means bust be Halal too- and its not as easy as it seems.

My urges tell me that I must marry immediately
but not to lower my standards as low as my gaze as I maintain my dignity
they tell me I must learn al loogal arabe-ya
but that I must be patient and persistent; knowledge doesn’t come easy
& that I mustnt waist time while pursing my degree
because it is only for the sake of the “woman’s safety”
I must memorize more Qu’ran and seek knowledge in the deen
while maintaining ties with friends and family and always treating Ummi as a Queen
I must make Hijrah for the sake of Allah and spend generously
so that my left hand knows not what my right hand gives in charity
I must erase the mistakes from my life- literally
regardless of all the pain it causes physically.

Theres so much going on, and “life has just begun”
I turn on the t.v. and war on Islam is still going on
I’m weak and breaking and the battles no where to be won
but I keep in mind that the Sirat-al-Mustaqeem is not a path I want to be turned away from.

As the ice freezes over NY it freezes over my heart turning it cold & hard
because its beginning to feel like I’m all alone following the Sunnah and what the Qu’ran made Fard
then I remember that everyone has their own unique individual problems
so I turn to Allah to keep us UNITED as He helps us solve them.

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3 Comments»

  khadija wrote @

Assalamu alaikum wr wb,

Thanks for checking out my blog.

Nasiha: dont rush into marriage!!! and definitely dont lower your standards. I know from experience!!!! Disaster – hence I am now single.

Keep your chin up, Allah has promised us so much and he never breaks His promise.

Your sister in Islam
Khadija

  Saba Yousaf wrote @

Salaams,

Warning:
Be careful not to be so proud/arrogant. Be humble for His sake(swt)

Advice:
Don’t delay marriage once you have found the right person. Make sure you marry for her/the DEEN.

Best wishes,
Saba.

  smunknown wrote @

JazakAllah for the advice Saba, and keep me in your dua’s!


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